Dear Men,

So you want to have buttsex, do you? Perhaps you've seen the act depicted in porn and it seemed hot, eh? You thought you'd like to have a new passage, a tighter passage, a more forbidden passage into which to dip your wick?

Congratulations! This is a lofty goal, and I'd like nothing more than to speed you on your path with all good will.

But before you get too carried away with dreams of the ass, may I fill you in on some few small details? I may? Thank you.

For the love of pete please first banish from your mind the thought that you will be able to fuck your partner's virgin ass tonight. You won't. You can't. At least, you can't fuck her ass tonight if you'd like to be able to fuck her ass ever again.

Don't ruin it for yourself, dude. Don't ruin it for every other man she's ever going to be with. Most of all, don't ruin it for HER. What you do now can affect how she'll think about buttsex---and about you---for a long time to come. Take it slowly and you will reap the benefits.

Next, don't try to "numb her to the pain." Yes there are products specifically for this purpose, but they are not a good idea. You don't want her numb to the pain. In fact you don't want her in pain at all.

What you want to do is introduce the idea to her gradually, as something you'd like for her to enjoy, not just bear. You want to go slowly, so that her body can learn to relax enough to accept first a toy, then maybe a finger, then after a long while and much pleasure, your body.

It's slow, understand? It's about trust. It's about learning together that you can do this without pain and without the world coming to an end if things go awry---and trust me, when there's buttsex happening, sooner or later things will go awry. Learning to handle these things is the difference between buttfuckery being either amazing or a complete disaster.

See what I mean? It's not about numbing her up and jamming it in tonight, ok?

Your ultimate goal is to make buttsex so incredibly pleasurable for her that she'll beg you for it. You want her wound up with enough desire that she'll moan, "Fuck my ass, baby, please fuck my ass!" every time you have sex.

Or, you know, maybe every other time.

Oh, and may I make one final suggestion? You want your girl to take it up the ass? Have a thought about showing her that it can be done. Get yourself a sweet lil' toy and put it in your own ass. Show her how easy it is. Show her that you love it. Show her that you're willing to do exactly the same thing you're asking her to do.

If this thought makes you cringe, consider that perhaps that's exactly how she's feeling about stuffing your big ol' sausage up there, you know what I'm saying?

Thank you for listening! Carry on now.

Sincerely,

aag